Wednesday, July 4, 2012

It was good-I am good!

Yesterday I dropped my kids off plus two extras at Friendship Place over in Rochester to do some volunteer work.  Friendship Place is a house in an impoverished neighborhood where kids can come and be "safe".  It is a place where they can relax, do their homework (during the school year) and experience some genuine love from people that do care for them and want them to succeed.  The Youth Director at our church is the director there and it is a non-denominational place that is supported by many local churches.  During the summer, different groups take a week to serve there and the kids love it. 

Anyway, I digress.  After I dropped off my van-load of kids of teenagers (and one 5-year-old) I decided to take the opportunity to do some grocery shopping ALL BY MYSELF!  What a luxury!  While I was at Wal-Mart (yes I shop Wal-Mart, I'm on a budget!) I decided that I was sick and tired of sweaty hair on the back of my neck and got a haircut.  In the middle of the haircut, my phone rang.  Out of habit, I check the number and notice it's my nurse calling.  Asked the stylist if she minded if I took the call quick (she was very gracious) and I answered. 

MY SURGERY WAS APPROVED!  I swear I almost started crying right there and then!  Told my nurse I was in the middle of a haircut and could I call her quick when I got home. Nurse said do you have time to pick a Wednesday.  Ummm..... Ok... "How about the last Wednesday in July?" I asked.  "He's wide open that day, you're on the books! Call me when you get home to set up appointments" I was told.

Finally!  A light at the end of the tunnel.  An actual day to start working towards! I called my husband and he was nearly excited about it as I was!

Now I have had about 24 hours for it to sink in.  It's real now.  Kind of like getting a due-date for a pregnancy, or in my case with 3 c-sections, an actual birth date.  It's 3 weeks away!  My life changes permanently in 3 short weeks.

Mike an I went out for lunch today while the kids were at Friendship Place.  Had some delicious Ethiopian food at a new restaurant.  It was my first time eating Ethiopian and it was really good.  Anyway, we talked about the "What now's".  I teared up and confessed to him that I have no image of what I'm going to even look like "skinny".  I've never been skinny.  In fact, I was in high school the last time I was below 200 pounds.  Mike said, "Well, look at our wedding picture."  I was 6-months pregnant and overweight in my wedding picture.  Not a good comparison.  I could look at my senior pictures from High School, but I was overweight then, too.  The realization that I could very possibly get down to my Jr. High weight settled in on me.  JUNIOR HIGH!  I don't know.. can you ever look at the mirror and see yourself as you actually are instead of what you see yourself as mentally?  It's going to be interesting in the next several months watching my body change dramatically.  I'm excited and.... scared?

I'm sure these are thoughts that go through the mind of anyone undergoing change.  I've been asked what people can do for me.  "Please just pray for me." I answer them.  Pray for me.  Pray for wisdon.  Pray for strength.  Pray for fortitude.  Pray for me to see myself as God views me.  I look in the mirror and see all my faults, my wrinkles, my scars, my flabbiness. God looks at me and sees beautiful.  God looks at me and sees His creation. On the sixth day he created mankind.  Genesis 1:31 says "God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning —the sixth day."

It was good.  I am good.  I'm about to wake up to a new morning of my life.   Philippians 4:13 reminds us:
Would you please pray that I keep this in mind as I move forward?  I still have a lot of obstacles to overcome.  The two-week liquid diet that I need to start next week scares me to death.  I love food.  I love the taste of it, the texture of it.  I have a couple of big picnic-type, potluck events in the next couple of weeks.  One of them that we're hosting.  No tastes... just my protein drinks and lots of water. Pray that I'm not tempted and I have the strength to get through these next few weeks.


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