Wednesday, July 18, 2012

He's Always Been Faithful....

Yesterday was a rough day.  Yesterday was one of those days that, 3 months ago,  I would've tossed up my hands, opened the fridge and eaten whatever was available.  I was frustrated and tired. I had gotten some not so good news and was feeling beaten down.  I would've eaten too much not so good stuff because of it.

Not today.  Not now.  I can't do that anymore.  I can't let the devil get to me like that.

It started out pretty good.  Rachael and I took Mike to work as the van was still at the shop and I figures since it was early, we might as well beat the heat and go feed the geese.  I've been stocking up on stale bread and it seemed like a good morning to do it.  It was a lot of fun!
As you can see, she had a good time, too!  I couldn't believe how bold the geese were that they would come up and eat right out of my hand.  I was waiting for them to gang up on Rachael and take her out for the bun!

We came home and the day kind of went downhill a bit. Called the new insurance company to make sure I wouldn't get stuck with the pre-existing condition clause since we will have a lapse of a week with no insurance and found out that it doesn't matter.  The new insurance company won't cover bariatric procedures.  Panic mode set in.  Yes, the surgery and the post-op visit will fall under our current insurance, but there is follow-up.  I'll have to continue meeting with my dietician, I'll have to go in for fills.  Those won't be covered.  So what did my husband say?  "Sarah, you worked too hard to turn back now.  We will make this work."  Tears.. I've been teary off and on all day.  I've been doing research on-line to see what it costs for self-payers and what I'm finding is reassuring.  Breathe, Sarah, breathe.  We can do this.  It's gonna be alright.

Had my appointment with my surgeon shortly after that.  It went well.  I'm down below my target weight for him to do the surgery so he was pleased with that.  Told me to continue with the liquid diet and continue to drop the weight.  I'm a week in.  Not going to stop now!

Then after my appointment with him, I went and had iced tea with a dear, dear friend.  We talked about life, we talked about kids, we talked about families.  We talked about church and how God brings good out of bad.  And He always has.

Sara Groves sings a song about it.  She actually sings a lot of songs that resonate deeply with me and more than one time I have found myself dissolving into tears while driving and listening to one of her albums.  This one has been going through my mind today:

He's Always Been Faithful
~Sara Groves~

Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Morning by morning I wake up to find

The power and comfort of God’s hand in mine
Season by season I watch Him, amazed
In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways
All I’m in need of, His hand will provide
He’s always been faithful to me

I can’t remember a trial or a pain

He did not recycle to bring me gain
I can’t remember one single regret
In serving God only, and trusting His hand
All I’m in need of, His hand will provide
He’s always been faithful to me

This is my anthem, this is my song

The theme of the stories I’ve heard for so long
God has been faithful, He will be again
His loving compassion, it knows no end
All I’m in need of, His hand will provide
He’s always been faithful, He’s always been faithful
He’s always been faithful to me 

Great song and a good reminder. He's always been faithful to me.  He will continue to be faithful.  It is a promise that He has made to us.  It's easy to focus on the negatives in our lives and Mike and I have been bombarded with a lot of those in the past couple of years, but we've also been so blessed.  We have each other, we have a good roof over our heads (even if we do need to replace the shingles!), we have great kids who are healthy, we have enough money to cover our needs, we have good friends.. I can go on and on!  God has been faithful.  He has blessed us with His gifts and the verse from the song that says, "I can’t remember a trial or a pain, He did not recycle to bring me gain" is so very true and evident in my life.

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